From Issue #13 (Fall 2009)
This Planet Sucks!
Platform: Atari 2600
Developer: Greg Troutman
Here’s a title that’s been around for a while. I have a copy from the days of Hozer, supposedly the version 1 before the bugfix to keep the screen from rolling (I’ve never had it happen, so for all I know, there wasn’t much of a problem to begin with). For those of you who enjoy label variations, Atari Age and Packrat have their own designs. Packrat’s looks more “official”, but the Atari Age one appeals to my “cute” sensibilities more. The guy on the label reminds me of Homestar Runner.
This Planet Sucks! is a single-boarder based on the Taito coin-op Lunar Rescue. Some people have taken up residence on a planet. I’m guessing the people who sold them on this idea were the same ones who sold my parents their timeshare. They want out. You pilot a lander that drops from the main ship. You descend through the atmosphere, avoiding obstacles and trying to keep your speed manageable. Like in Lunar Lander, hit the ground with too much momentum and you’ll crash like a WinME computer running the ICQ chat client. There are three people per board to rescue, each on a differently sized platform. They are running around on them, so you have to land where they aren’t or you’ll squash them. Pick one up, and the air obstacles begin dropping bombs that you have to avoid as you return to the main ship. Crash too many times, kill all the people you need to rescue, or run out of fuel, and that’s the end of the game.
This game takes a lot of coordination. Not only do you need to manage your fuel resources, but you’ll need to gauge when it is relatively safe to begin your trek through the atmosphere. The ship moves slow — it’s not sloppy, it just uses momentum, so you can’t stop on a dime and adjust like you can with, say, Cosmic Commuter. The colors are a bit garish, but they work and basically make you sympathize with these poor souls you are supposed to rescue (and wonder what exactly made this place appealing to them to begin with).
This was one of the first wave of homebrew games, and it holds up pretty good. It requires actual skill instead of just steering a free-moving vessel around the screen. An excellent addition to your Atari library.
- Peter G
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